The 28 Stages of Dealing With a Playoff Loss

by Alex Gara

1. (Before the Game is Over) Illogical Optimism
2. (As the Game is Ending) Anything Can Happen (It Can’t)
3. Swift Gut Punch of Disappointment
4. You Guys Deserve it. Great Game.
5. Paralyzing Anger Glossed Between Your Brain and Your Eyes
6. Pretending like You’re not Experiencing #5
7. Playing Back the Last Shot on a Loop
8. A Full Inventory of Shot Selection
9. Rumination Over Missed Opportunities Earlier in the Game
10. Secretly Blaming a Teammate
11. Audibly Blaming Yourself
12. Shots
13. Who Cares?
14. Caring
15. I Don’t Mind Losing to a Team That Plays That Well. (You Mind)
16. Explaining How You Lost to Someone Who is Only Half-Listening
17. Pacing
18. Overanalyzing
19. Who Wants a Shot?
20. Enjoying the Championship with a Manic Overcorrection
21. Am I Drunk?
22. Supportive Texts to Your Teammates
23. (Turns Into) We Would Beat That Team 4 Out of 5 Times
24. Bad Late Night Food Decisions
25. (Getting Into Bed) Last Shot on a Loop Returns
26. Insomnia (Regret + #24)
27. I think I’m out next season
28. Let’s run it back

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